Op-Ed: I, an on-campus frosh, locked myself out of my room, and my solution was to ask MTL if I could sleep over at his house.

The first time I locked myself out of my room, I asked…

Op-Ed: Halloween 2020 Sucks

Corona has made me realize a lot of things – that it…

Our Earnest Congratulations to Stanford’s Two Economics Nobel Laureates for their Invention of the So-Called “Money”

It has come to our attention that the Flipside did not recognize…

Student Who Brags About Sleeping 3 Hours A Night Laments That His Talents Would Be Better Recognized If He Lived in The Paleolithic Era Defending His Cave from Predators All Night

“Prehistoric man was anywhere from seven to nine feet tall, you know,”…

I Failed My Midterm, So I Invited All My Friends Over for a Party, Dressed Up as a Piñata, and Made Them Beat Me

Well folks, it’s about that time of year: when the neighbors put…

Apple Partners with US Military to Produce Apple-Brand War Crimes

Child labor provider Apple Inc. recently announced that it is partnering with…

i really miss licking handrails :(

It’s been over six months since I last licked a handrail and…

I’m not like the other girls— I have COVID

You see an enchanting figure across the room–tussling her long, blonde hair.…

Following investigation of lecturer Alex Gould, SEC realizes that entirety of Stanford University is and elaborate, multi-tiered marketing pyramid scheme led by MTL

Last month, the Univeristy was shocked when the United States Securities and…

Op-Ed: My Selfish Fucking Little Brother Just Wasted His Make-A-Wish on a Trip to Disneyworld

Can you believe this shit? I sure as hell can’t. My terminally…