Sesame street introduces new voting segment where Big Bird chases undecided voters down the street and beats them until they promise to vote for Joe Biden

Outbreak of Cyberbullying Devastates Millions of Youths After Melania Trump Leaves White House

A specter is haunting the teens of America—the specter of cyberbullying. For…

Josh Hawley promises not to say the n-word this Black History Month 

Dr. Fauci Feels Much More Comfortable Walking Around Public Now That He Is Not Being Traced By the Red Dot of a Nearby Army Sniper

In many ways the nation took a big sigh of relief after…

Woah! Did Biden just hit a bong while Trump was talking about the economy and curl up into the fetal position on stage?

Beau Biden Comes Back from the Grave to Fuck Melania 

AN EXCLUSIVE LOOK INTO THE ABUSIVE PRACTICES OF THE LATE-REPUBLICAN ROMAN DAIRY INDUSTRY: CITIZENS, LEARN WHAT THE SENATE IS PUTTING INTO YOUR CHEESE

Be aware, citizen! Though all good citizens know that to swill milk…

Trump Sends Out Second Stimulus Package

Following an executive order, President Donald Junipero Trump has sent out “a…

The First Presidential Debate Was Too Hot for Television

Tuesday night’s debate was rife with more sexual tension than Ghislaine Maxwell…

Government promises to stick glowing vial of untested liquid into your arm by Thanksgiving