Cashier in publix forcefully stops man (me) from shoving an entire iced bundt cake down my throat in a crime of passion

“I hate and I love. Why do I do this, perhaps you…

Several thousand page Brexit document sent to Brussels for finalization turns out to be intricately drawn Phineas and Ferb hentai

With the turn of the new year the five year Brexit deal…

Dear Abby: My polygamous family is falling apart! What should I do??

Oh man, where to even begin. What was once a happy family…

Deuteronomy 28

1 If you fully obey the Lord your Star nosed mole and…

Dr. Fauci Feels Much More Comfortable Walking Around Public Now That He Is Not Being Traced By the Red Dot of a Nearby Army Sniper

In many ways the nation took a big sigh of relief after…

I Failed My Midterm, So I Invited All My Friends Over for a Party, Dressed Up as a Piñata, and Made Them Beat Me

Well folks, it’s about that time of year: when the neighbors put…

NFL Players Nonchalant About Daily Risk of Crippling Head Trauma Weirdly Terrified By COVID

As American sports begins the slow process to reopening and getting back…

Op-Ed: To Ensure My Vote Counts I Nailed A Copy of My Ballot to Every Door in My State Capitol

You heard me right. With all the damn kerfuffle around ballots and…

Op-Ed: I Tried Returning to Campus for My Stuff, and Now I’m Imprisoned in the Prison from the Stanford Prison Experiment

As soon as I entered campus, I felt eyes begin to follow…

Op-Ed: My Super Exclusive Internship with NASA Was Just Cancelled So I Guess I’m Stuck Slumming It in My Huge London Flat

So there I was, just sitting in my trophy room in my…