Maybe you were surprised last week when the host of last week’s Democratic debate passed around a cinnamon roll to each candidate and asked them to show how they would eat it. Well, I wasn’t. I knew that this was a moment of truth. That there’s something crucial revealed in […]
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Flipside News in Brief: Candy, Racism, Candy
Gummy Bears Exist Solely to Fuck and Die, Study Finds A recent Harvard study found evidence suggesting that gummy bears’ sole purpose...
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Op-Ed: So What If I Put Sweet-and-Savory Ham, Black Forest Turkey, a Delectable Cheese Selection, and Honey Dijon on My Pop Tart?
Sandwich-making is a secret lore, a tradition, an art— and though I must work with imperfect ingredients and facilities, only a poor...
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Student Staff Group Interview Devolves into Bloodbath After RF Throws Snapped Pool Cue, Depressed Frosh into Room
Applications for next year’s Resident Assistant roles at Otero took a dark turn last Saturday after what presented itself as a lighthearted...
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Amazing – Schoolyard Kid Single-Handedly Eliminates Bullying by Choosing Smallest, Wimpiest Kid for His Recess Dodgeball Team
The sun was out, the birds were chirping, and the 8.5-inch rubber dodgeballs were ready to fly. The captains were chosen per the tried-and-true...
Headlines
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Grinning EBF Resident Turns On Weed-Scented Glade Plug-In
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To Celebrate Black History Month, Buttigieg Campaign Will Highlight Each of Their Black Supporters Over the Last 9 Days of the Month
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Nasty nasty worms are crawling out of teens’ eyeballs, but is it safe? Inside TikTok’s viral new “Worm-Eye Challenge”
- Breaking: Flipside Will No Longer Be Independently Funding the FoHo
- Stanford to Host Climate Change Debate Between SCR and Guy in White Plaza Shouting ‘End is Nigh’
- Baby Yoda Redesigned After Audience Pushback Claiming He Looks ‘Too Fuckable’
Stanford
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Grinning EBF Resident Turns On Weed-Scented Glade Plug-In
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Student Staff Group Interview Devolves into Bloodbath After RF Throws Snapped Pool Cue, Depressed Frosh into Room
Applications for next year’s Resident Assistant roles at Otero took a dark turn last Saturday...
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Breaking: Flipside Will No Longer Be Independently Funding the FoHo
- University Sure to Take All the Wrong Lessons from Latest Tragedy
- Freshmen Ashamed to Admit to Not Smoking Weed in Front of Father
- Sierra Camp Recruitment Ups its Game by Replacing all the Toilet Paper with Flyers
Politics
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To Celebrate Black History Month, Buttigieg Campaign Will Highlight Each of Their Black Supporters Over the Last 9 Days of the Month
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Disastrous Iowa Caucuses Were Using Stanford Web Authentication Services, Investigation Reveals
Technological and infrastructural complications with the Iowa caucuses earlier this week have been...
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John Bolton Catfished Into Congressional Testimony by Adam Schiff Pretending to be Busty Young Ukrainian
As a result of growing uncertainty surrounding whether current Challenger rank I in League of Legends...
- Flipside Proudly Endorses Elizabeth Warren, Amy Klobuchar, Hillary Clinton, Julia Child, Katy Perry, the “Tiger Mom,” and 282 Other Women for President
- Facing Impeachment, Trump Recruits the One Man He Hoped He’d Never Have to Ask for Help: Duke Vengeance, PI
- Former SCR President Finally Leaves Hospital 16 Months After “The Push”
Opinion
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Op-Ed: After Seeing Each Democratic Candidate Eat a Cinnamon Roll at Last Week’s Debate, I Know that Pete’s the One
Maybe you were surprised last week when the host of last week’s Democratic debate passed around...
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Op-Ed: So What If I Put Sweet-and-Savory Ham, Black Forest Turkey, a Delectable Cheese Selection, and Honey Dijon on My Pop Tart?
Sandwich-making is a secret lore, a tradition, an art— and though I must work with imperfect ingredients...
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Op-Ed: I’m an Assistant Professor and I Show You I’m Cool Through My Hip Emails
Hey, little dude. It’s me, your assistant professor in his mid-thirties, the one with the cool...
- Dear SCR: If I Use Dark Magicks to Infuse an Unholy Flesh-Golem with a Soul, But Abort the Ritual Prematurely, Is That Murder?
- Op-Ed: From Now On, if a Friend Shows Me a “Funny Video” and It’s Not Funny, I’m Going to Strangle Them with a Plastic Bag
- Op-Ed: Girl in the Socks and Crocs, You Have Stolen My Heart
Technology
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Movie Magic: CGI Carrie Fisher to be Posthumously Inserted into “Epic / Hilarious Nut-Taps [4 hrs]” Youtube Compilation
In recent weeks, there has been some rumbling surrounding J.J. Abrams’ decision to feature a computer-generated...
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Andrew Yang Warns That AI Will Soon Automate All Your Time-Wasting Bullshit
During a recent campaign stop, presidential hopeful Andrew Yang returned to what has become a central...
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Op-Ed: In Only Ten Weeks, Duolingo Made Me Proficient In Slurs
I was initially skeptical about practicing my language skills with Duolingo. People kept saying...
- Wow! Turns Out Clippy was Involved with Operation Paperclip, the U.S. Program that Reincorporated Nazi Scientists Into American Society
- TED Talk Speaker Struggles to Open PowerPoint from Flash Drive
- Newly-Announced Strain of ‘Cuties’ Never Goes Bad, Even as Image on Packaging Rots Away
Recent Posts
1 month ago
Op-Ed: After Seeing Each Democratic Candidate Eat a Cinnamon Roll at Last Week’s Debate, I Know that Pete’s the One
1 month ago
Grinning EBF Resident Turns On Weed-Scented Glade Plug-In
1 month ago
To Celebrate Black History Month, Buttigieg Campaign Will Highlight Each of Their Black Supporters Over the Last 9 Days of the Month
1 month ago
“I Can’t Stop Anthropomorphizing M&Ms Before Eating Them” — An Open Letter / Apology / Plea to First Look Host Maria Menounos
1 month ago
Flipside News in Brief: Candy, Racism, Candy