With the close of the election just last week, President Obama revealed his plans for a second term. “I’m thinking we just take it easy and chill for a bit. As a country, we all need to slow down and, like, relax. Four years is a long time.” The President was reportedly seen setting up a lawn chair in front of the White House with a piña colada in his hand, a stark contrast to earlier in the week during his campaign.

Stanford Junior Bob Thorpe, in between not doing psets and “chillaxing” has begun to emulate Obama, he tells the Flipside. “Welcome to Brobama’s America, man. It’s a changing political climate and you’re either with it or you’re not.”

In response to the new plan set forth by the Obama administration, the Republican Party has come up with a plan of their own. “We’re just going to have to be hardasses on every other issue that we disagree on. If the Democrats don’t like that, well, they brought it on themselves. Someone has to be the force of balance in this country.” says Speaker Boehner tearfully as he destroyed his last t-shirt.

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