350 Articles Local Year 12 Elitist Fœtus Refuses To Be Born Until Ivy Leagues Open Back Up Boston, MA— In protest of recent Covid-19 closures, a 7-month-old fœtus is… Camilla WickmanMay 26, 2020
An Open Letter to My Aunt Doris Who is Learning to Use the Internet Dear Aunt Doris, I am proud of you. You have worked hard… Camilla WickmanMay 12, 2020
344 Articles Local Year 12 Report: Frosh Optimistically Cancels Birthday Party Because More Than 150 People Were Gonna Come For Sure Following numerous updates from Stanford administrators regarding COVID-19 in the past week,… Mags PosenthalApril 19, 2020
Amazing – Schoolyard Kid Single-Handedly Eliminates Bullying by Choosing Smallest, Wimpiest Kid for His Recess Dodgeball Team The sun was out, the birds were chirping, and the 8. 5-inch… Alex DurhamFebruary 14, 2020
337 Articles Local Year 12 Man Who Kidnapped Transients and Locked Them in Sadistic Puzzle-Room Frustrated That They’ve Yet to Come Together as a Team Furrowing his brow and putting his head in his hands with an… Byron CalabasasJanuary 24, 2020
334 Articles Local Year 12 Stanford Justifies Campus Expansion as “Reclaiming Promised Lands” Gifted to Dying Leland Stanford Jr. by God Himself “This is what we’ve been training for, folks!” Harry Elam Jr. barked… Ben Harley DavidsonNovember 20, 2019
322 Articles Local Year 11 Five Days After Young Boy Reported Missing Within “Comfy Chair,” Body Recovered Five days after the shocking news that area preteen Cody Parks had… Byron CalabasasMay 7, 2019
316 Articles Local Year 11 Film Studies Major Writing Thesis on Shower Thots 4 Stanford undergraduate Senior Mandy Thompson is reportedly writing her capstone thesis for… Ben Harley DavidsonMarch 11, 2019
315 Articles Local Year 11 Hysterical Man on Stage Wants to Tell You About His Dick A hysterical man was spotted on stage this past weekend with a… Deedee AndersonMarch 7, 2019
317 Local Year 11 Queso Crisis: Exhausted Cheese Grating Waiter Still Waiting for a “When” It all began with senior Zoe Baldoro, a delicious bowl of gnocchi… Alex DurhamFebruary 25, 2019
