The name says it all. Most likely, you’ve already seen ********** ‘s flier taped to a bulletin board. We decided to endorse this particular candidate because ********** really stands out to us. You can easily distinguish ********** from the rest of the pack, it’s just that x-factor. With a unique and beneficial platform, we know that, if elected, ********** will deal with the issues most important to students on campus.

We at the Flipside had a rare opportunity to ask smudge a hard-hitting question about the issues.

What kind of platform are you running on?

Well, to name just a few, I want to promote student health, community centers, Student Wellness, ASSU events, sustainability, diversity, student activism, ASSU transparency, class pride, green living, and awareness. I will also work hard to promote town hall meetings so students can have their voices heard.

Here at the Flipside—we know these few things are especially important, so we are endorsing ********** for the ASSU Senate. What makes ********** stand out is that the other candidates just don’t seem to get it. Some of them value Wellness, others promte activism, or diversity, but only ********** understands what students care about.

Again, we especially want to emphasize this particular candidate’s uniqueness! ********** ‘ s slogan is so clever, we’re sure you won’t forget it when you go to place your vote ( ********** ********** ). Some of us here at the Flipside will be voting this candidate on election day, and we hope you realize you should as well.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

Sign Up for Our Newsletter

Get the Stanford Flipside sent to your inbox!

You May Also Like

Study Confirms That Bitches, As Suspected, Ain’t Shit But Hoes and Tricks

When Dr. Dre proposed in his seminal theoretical work, “The Chronic”, the…

Study Finds: If Your Hand is Bigger than Your Face You Need Surgery

In a packed auditorium on Saturday, Stanford Hospital Director Ken Toshi informed…

Connections to Steroid Ring Finally Explain Peyton Manning’s Giant Forehead

Following last week’s announcement of an upcoming Al-Jazeera documentary that alleges that…