PALO ALTO-In a highly anticipated press conference Friday morning, Stanford’s administration revealed the eagerly awaited IHUM 2 to a crowd of humanities buffs and early adopters.

IHUM fans in the audience were not disappointed– Michelle Schwartz, a proud user of the first IHUM, told Gizmodo that Stanford’s newest innovation was “totally cool and packed with new features none of us could have ever predicted.

Not only does the IHUM 2 boast a completely new interface and diverse color scheme, its central processing unit in Sweet Hall is rumored to work twice as fast as before. In addition, according to Stanford’s registrar, the IHUM 2 will be nearly fifteen percent lighter and 33 percent thinner than the IHUM.

“The new design will be much easier for students to fit it in their schedules,” said Stanford’s Vice Provost.

Notwithstanding its successful debut, there have been some grumbles about the IHUM 2. John Lewis is one such unhappy camper.

“It’s like, come on,” he complained, “I paid a couple thousand dollars for the original IHUM just nine months ago, and now Stanford comes out with this better version.

It’s kind of insulting.”

On the whole, consumer response was positive, judging by the approximately 1600 preorders Stanford has already fielded for the upcoming year.

You May Also Like

Breaking: Flipside Writer Gives Up Satire for Lent

This past Wednesday, Magellan J. Pfluke, reported staff writer and editor for…

Gaieties actor on vocal rest ends up taking permanent vow of silence, no one cares

Sources confirmed yesterday that an actor in Gaieties 2017 who has been…

Asshole Student Hates Everyone, Blames It On The Weather

This past Monday, a rather unfortunate smattering of events occurred circling around…

Freshmen Not That Hot This Year

Coming on the heels of an unseasonably cool NSO period, numerous independent…