“How’s Chloe?” Janice McDermott asked her daughter, Amika McDermott (’16), over the phone Monday morning, evidently unaware that the aforementioned Chloe is simply a close acquaintance of Amika’s who Mrs. McDermott happened to have passingly met at Parents’ Weekend. “I just want to check in on you and your friends—you […]Read more ›
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“…I think there will be party favors” –Freshman, calling parentsRead more ›
Last Thursday, SUPD was called in to the Roble Package Center to investigate a worrying package that had been marked for investigation by the package center workers. The package aroused suspicion after its only noticeable marking was a card that said, “Don’t open it right away… there’s a special surprise […]Read more ›
Everything was going great this Thanksgiving, why did you have to fuck it up? What things could you possibly have ruined? Let’s take a look around the kitchen. 1. The Cranberry Sauce: Aw man, you saw the look on Aunt Josephine’s face, and it’s hard to disappoint Aunt Josephine. The […]Read more ›
When freshman Josh Crawford’s mother Lillian informed him that she would be attending Parents’ Weekend, he expected that she would spend her time exploring campus and buying him overpriced meals in Palo Alto. “I thought she would just act like a normal parent,” he told reporters, “but I guess I […]Read more ›