Op Ed: To Prepare for the Math 51 Final, I Created a “Mind Palace” Full of Dancing, Anthropomorphic Versions of the Digits Zero Through Nine

When you first see a math problem on the impending Math 51…

Average Stanford Student Adversity Score Somehow in the Negatives

Researchers were shocked to discover that the average Stanford student scores a…

Op Ed: A Joseph A. Banks Employee Won’t Stop Crashing My Lecture, and When a Tie Clip Took My Right Eye I’d Had Enough

“You’re dressed like shit! Take this!” the man screams. He rips off…

Amid Human Rights Abuses and Declining Support for Local Regime, U.S. Backs Coup in Flint, Michigan

As the humanitarian crisis worsens and citizens grow increasingly critical of local…

Op-Ed: Empirically, Frat Guys Paying at Tresidder with Number of Times Vomited is Not a Valid Form of Currency

“Okay, that’ll be fourteen dollars.” Ah, Tresidder Tuesday. Usually a rainy affair,…