As the end of last month approached, Scott Davies — an unpaid intern for a local architecture firm — was beginning to worry about how he’d cover his rent. But after checking his lease, Davies realized he had nothing to fear: his landlord accepted ‘work experience’ as payment.
“Since my job only compensates me with ‘exposure’ and ‘real-world skills,’ I initially thought I wasn’t profiting at all,” explained Davies. “But luckily for me, those are actually totally valid forms of currency thanks to a loophole in the Constitution of the Treasury, drawn up by Alexander Hamilton himself! It’s legal tender, which means that, by law, people are required to accept it.”
In addition to his rent, Davies was able to cover all other monthly expenses — including food, transportation, healthcare, and a fully-functional World War II M18 Hellcat tank that he purchased on eBay — with the invaluable hands-on experience he gained in the workplace. Davies even reportedly used some of his lucrative work experience to purchase extra lives in the popular iPhone game Candy Crush Soda Saga.
“No, we don’t pay our interns with ‘traditional’ forms of money like the ‘dollar bill’ or the ‘gold doubloon,’” said Lana Krubble, CEO of Millennium Architectural Solutions and Davies’ boss. “But what we do give them is far more valuable. You simply can’t put a price on the benefits that come from exerting physical/mental/emotional labor on an employer’s behalf.”
At press time, Davies had just discovered he was being investigated for tax evasion after failing to report his theoretically infinite quantities of work experience to the IRS.