The Johnsons’ “Saltwater 8000”

Beyond the double-backed resin panels of this pool, there lies an unfathomable evil, the likes of which man has yet to encounter.

The Mellenors’ “Contempra”

36 condoms, most of which are used.

The Carters’ “Aquadium”

No pool skimmer is sturdy enough to handle the horrors that have burrowed deep into the warranty-backed filter inside this particular Aquadium.

The Turners’ “Magnifer 3250”

A rat’s nest? A wig from a mannequin in a sex shop? It’s unclear whether the clump of strands pulled from the Turners’ pool used to belong to some wretched soul.

The Kostowskis’ “Aquus Series 4720 XL”

The Kostowskis’ spared no expense when purchasing a summertime haven for their children…Or did they? Check the filter, dear reader, and stare into the very depths of fear.

The Garcias’ “HydroPalace Elite

Some kid found just a ball of ants. Like the size of a softball. Jesus.

The Harrisons’ “Shit Tub 5650”

You don’t want to know.

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