Stanford’s notoriously crazy Halloween party became even crazier Friday night when, as students danced atop the crypts containing the Stanford family’s remains, the university’s namesake awoke, and his animated skeleton exited the crypt in which he and his parents were entombed.

“At first I thought it was just a super realistic costume, but when his arm fell off, I realized exactly what had happened,” said Sophomore Bill Hammersmith.

“At first we all backed away, but when Leland started to do the stinky leg, we realized he just wanted to have fun. And holy shit can he break it down. I didn’t even know legs could bend like that,” said Junior Hannah Biggs. “I always though that our dancing on the founders’ graves would cause some kind of calamity, but I’m happy that Leland just wanted to join us in celebrating Halloween,” continued Biggs. “It’s a pity that he didn’t have tongue or lips with which to form intelligible sounds, since I really wanted to get his number. His pelvic structure was incredible.”

Leland was reported to be the life of the party before he was removed by security for not wearing clothes.

You May Also Like

Class Ends after Student DM’s Zoom professor ‘effective. Powerلُلُصّبُلُلصّبُرر  ॣ ॣh ॣ ॣ 冗’

According to multiple reports from amazed students and distraught TAs, a single…

Campus Couples Recoil as Sex Week Leads to “What’s on Your Mind?” Week

After a long-awaited and singularly cathartic Sex Week, half of Stanford’s satiated…