Freshman Katie Swimmer took her parents to the Treehouse for lunch last weekend, but she couldn’t stop her parents from commenting on the potato forks they used to eat their meal.
“They just wouldn’t shut the fuck up about the damn potato forks,” commented Katie, “I haven’t seen them in months, and all they wanted to talk about was how ‘green’ the campus was.
Whoop-dee fuckin doo.”

Katie’s parents couldn’t be reached, but we hear they are still beside themselves and still can’t believe they made utensils out of potatoes.

You May Also Like

Op-ed: If we shared a pond, I would not share fishing rights

I was once a fish, but then I went to war. Terrible…

The LORD Divideth Not the Rind from the Flesh. So Sayeth the LORD, Eat the Watermelon in Whole.

As it is written in the Scripture, the LORD maketh all the…

Teenage Girl Loses Faith in Horoscope, Turns to Magic Eight Ball

At approximately 2:50pm EST, as the students of Carter Middle School filed…