Wow, what is that even supposed to be kid? It looks like you microwaved a bowl of crayons, mixed the wax with cereal, ate the cereal, threw it up, and then called it a picture of a dinosaur. Is that thing that looks like athlete’s foot supposed to be your house? Damn kid, it seems like all the talent you lack in drawing and basic hand movements I make up for with my DJing ability. That’s right, I got a SoundCloud, and you should check it out.

How did you ever think that the outline of a child’s hand would even remotely resemble a turkey? Shit, well, my tracks on SoundCloud are like a mix of lo-fi jazz, electronica americana, hard rap, punk rock, and—actually, it’s kind of a whole new kind of sound.  Pretty powerful stuff.  Could really help you take your mind off your violently meager lack of artistic talent. I really want to help people through my music, you know?  I can’t help you fix whatever the fuck that scribbled amoeba is supposed to be, but I can help you find yourself.

Once Lil Kibbles liked one of my tracks, did you know that? Pretty cool, huh. Hey kid, how old are you? Nine? Damn, that’s way too old for this drawing to look this way.  But, it’s not too old to lose yourself in my NASTY beats.  My handle is @DJMcShitFuck. Check it out.

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