PALO ALTO, CA – Pondering President Trump’s recent attacks on Nordstrom and the implications of that day’s pre-spring shopping spree, Palo Alto resident and known Nordstrom enthusiast Andrea Stevens added “Activism” to the “Interests/Activities” section of her resume early Sunday evening.

 “As soon as I saw Trump attacking Nordstrom on Twitter, I knew I had to respond,” Stevens said. “Being the protester that I am, I drove to the nearest Nordstrom and bought every article of clothing that I thought was even marginally cute.
This will definitely get under his skin!” Stevens allegedly bought 78 worth of clothing, jewelry, makeup, and purses, marking her emphatic support for both marginalized communities and the beginning of the spring fashion season.

 Stevens explained that this type of protesting is key to the American democracy. “If more people resisted Trump by buying all the brands that he has feuded with on Twitter, he’d get so mad he’d quit the presidency. This is what Bernie Sanders wants us all to do.
 

When asked about why she publicized her ‘protest’ by adding “Activism” to her resume, Stevens said that all of the protests she has participated in over the past two weeks, such as deleting Uber from her phone, boycotting LL Bean, and spending a thousand dollars at Nordstrom, deserved some recognition. At press time, Stevens was spotting contacting NowThis, Mic, and ATTN to inquire about making a video regarding her efforts.

You May Also Like

Really Bad Biker Gets CUI

By Larry Seidman STANFORD, CA—Stanford sophomore undergraduate Alex Tempkin was arrested last…

High School Senior Attempts To Think of Role Model That Isn’t MLK, Gandhi

As college application season rolls around again, hundreds of thousands of high…

Music Review: The Ousted Republicans EP

If you haven’t heard of The No Gay Sex Pistols, the hot…

Op-Ed: One Time an Athlete in a Golf Cart Ran Over My Dog and When I Asked Him to Apologize He Laughed and Ran Over My Cat

My tale begins way back when I was a wee frosh, I…