Researchers from the United Nations announced on Sunday that Nargistan, once a backwater of the former Soviet Union, has finally reached the key developmental checkpoint of overwhelming indifference among its voting populace.
“Nargistan’s transformation has been remarkable,” stated U.N. Secretary General Ban Ki-moon. “Only decades ago, the nation was a pre-industrial bastion of democratic idealism- its people dreamed of the day they could live at international standards of comfort under a government they could mostly disregard.
With the rise of globalization, though, the Nargistanis have gained access to Netflix, hoverboards, and the feeling that there may have just recently been an election that they completely missed.”
Sources in Nargistan have reported a widespread lack of interest in the announcement, with one native offering, “My parents’ generation huddled around radios to hear their Prime Minister speak. I guess I’m not that different; my girlfriend and I huddled around my laptop to watch Friends last night.”
The nation’s current P.M. commented, “We are extremely proud. Now that our people have stopped caring about the actions of our Parliament, we can finally join the rest of the world in shifting our focus toward creating tax breaks for corporations and exploiting our natural resources. With Super PACs poised to take over the role of educating the Nargistani people about their representatives, our great nation will be able to completely relate to its First World brethren, once and for all.
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