By Arkidiy Zilomanov, Tourism Minister of Novosibirsk Oblast

Hello Friend, are you scrutinizing possible options for a most fortuitous spring holiday? Rummage no further, as we have perfect option for you. From world-class attraction, Novosibirsk Zoo, to many factories included Siberian Food Corporation and Electro-Vacuum Plant, Novosibirsk, capital of the Novosibirsk Oblast of Russia, can satisfy all desire of most cherished students from America!

And this is not to mention that Novosibirsk is largest city in all of Siberia. It so large that there is very unlikely possibility that explorations of surrounding area will result in boredom. Want have fun in city? You go to Novosibirsk Zoo! Want to get alcoholic refreshment? This is additionally available at Novosibirsk Zoo! Are you experiencing desires to witness art? Animals at Novosibirsk Zoo are God’s artwork! We have 30 species of Siberian possum on display! Largest in all of world-possum display available, it is good zoo, friend.

Or perhaps you possess inclination to watch sporting? Lokomotiv Novosibirsk is premier volleyball team, and is best in Russia and certainly better than assholes Dynamo Moscow. They are cheating scoundrels! Novosibirsk even have glorious beaches on banks of river Ob. We have average yearly temperature of 45° fahrenheit, very warm, yes comrade? Listen, who need Mexico? Why “fun in sun”? Choose Novosibirsk; it fun in Russia! Here, we have car ready for you. It Chrysler 300—American Muscles as you say! Get in, and beget yourself a most first-class experience. Without joke. Get in.

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