Tupac Hologram Murdered on Las Vegas Strip

April 24, 2012 6:00 am
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Tupac Hologram Murdered on Las Vegas Strip

After stunning crowds at the Coachella Valley Music & Arts Festival with the realistic look of a holographic Tupac Shakur, Dr. Dre and Snoop Dogg did what any excited reveling superstars would do: they hit Vegas with their new invention. Little did they know, however, the grief that they would encounter there.

At approximately 8PM on Friday night, they popped holographic bottles with Tupac and attended a boxing match at the MGM Grand. As Dre, Snoop, and the holographic Tupac exited the venue, they were approached by a member of the Southside Crips. Nothing happened though, as the Crips member was just there to gamble and was simply too drunk to notice Dre, Snoop, and Tupac gallivant through the lobby. Dre, Snoop, and the hologram then took to the road.

At 10:54 PM, while stopped at a red light, Snoop Dogg rolled a mighty joint in the backseat of the BMW that the three were riding in. At 10:56, an unmarked vehicle drove up alongside the BMW. The passengers of the unmarked vehicle doused Tupac’s projector with a super soaker before driving off. When police and medics arrived, the Tupac hologram was pronounced dead.

Rumor has it that the drivers of the unmarked vehicle were members of the entourage of the holographic version of the Notorious B.I.G., which was engineered by Shaggy, Coolio, Ghostface Killah, and Thom Yorke.

“When we engineered the holographic Biggie, we didn’t program it to kill anybody, or to hire hitmen,” reports Shaggy, “or if we did, I swear it wasn’t me.”

“It was me,” said Thom Yorke, allegedly.

“Fuck that shit,” said Dre, taking a hit from Snoop’s giant joint and lightly cupping his balls in his hands, “Pac, buddy, I’ll miss you and send my prayers to hologram heaven for you. Again.”

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