Jews Haggle Over Value of Human Life

The recent landmark prisoner exchange between Israeli and Palestinian governments marks the beginning of new negotiation opportunities on both sides of the Jordan. But Jews of the world are torn over the achievement. “Of course we’re glad to see one of our soldiers returned safely home,” said one Israeli representative. “But over a thousand prisoners for one man? Oy vey!”

A member of Israeli parliament lamented that, after five years, they expected to have reached a more successful bargain. “You always start low,” he intoned, stroking his beard, “and meet them in the middle. But those meshuganes drove a hard bargain.” Some malcontents pointed out that the Americans recovered their two captive hikers from Iran for practically nothing. The Flipside Israel correspondent reports, however, that the event met with largely positive reactions, festivities, and much manischewitz.