Yesterday, Obama took the opportunity to say words, a rare event that only occurs several times each day.

Many political pundits have applauded Obama’s recent words, hailing them as a shaping force with the potential to change America–and the world–for the better.

“Obama’s words have opened my eyes and made me into a better person,” said Tyler Whitman, CEO of prominent cleaning supplies manufacturer Detergency. “For a second I thought he was going to say different words, but then he surprised me by saying something else.”

“Wow,” he added. “Wow!”

Others, however, have been less receptive of Obama’s recent words.

“To be honest, Obama’s words were a disappointment,” said John Cartman, owner of “He used too many prepositions, and his arrangement of gerunds was by no means optimal. Even Obama’s rich, seductive, almost musical, baritone voice couldn’t make up for his subpar words.”

“I am also not a very big fan of his limited variation in emphatic hand gestures,” added Cartman.

Several deaf commentators were unable to comment on Obama’s words but have praised his face for its kind yet wise appearance.

Critics have been oddly silent on Obama’s wardrobe and hair style.

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