Chalk this one up to another win for the socialist left, folks: according to reports coming in from Detroit, MI, a lazy susan continues to receive welfare benefits from big government even though it hasn’t made an effort to seek employment and wasn’t even born in the U.S.

Disgusting! That money is meant for hard-working American-made cabinets, not a spinning spice-rack that thinks it’s too good to get a job.

Yet this lazy susan continues to suck off the teat of Uncle Sam’s generosity, taking advantage of food stamps, tax breaks, and public benefit programs that were only ever supposed to be for those who actually contribute to society. Spell this one out for me, lie-berals: how is a rotating countertop tray going to make America great again?

There are plenty of decent, red-blooded patriots out there struggling just to get by, but you don’t see them stealing from others just to finance their addictions. So how come the ol’ U.S. of A. is allowed to tax people, take the profits, and then give all of that money to a piece of furniture that’ll just spend it on lobster bisque and crack?

And that’s not to mention how this lazy, lazy susan isn’t even a real citizen. Yup, you heard me right; we’re getting swindled by a kitchen appliance that doesn’t even have a green card. America used to be for Americans, but now I guess even a spinning slab of wood can just walk right over the border and start leeching off of our wealth now that O-bimbo’s had his vile way with Lady Liberty.

Welfare is meant for people who actually bring something to the table in this country — so how can a lazy susan do that, when its big, lazy bottom is already plopped on top of that table? Logic, libtards: maybe try it some time.

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