Thursday, Junior Adam Murray noticed that his pal Hal Guthrie tended to be a whole lot nicer post-bone sesh with his girlfriend of one year, Kaitlin Marcus. This realization occurred to him when he kept seeing Guthrie emerge from Marcus’ room in Crothers Hall just before dinner with a smirk of contentment and skip in his step. A complete ignorance of his inside-out clothing demonstrated his sex-induced carefree outlook on life. “I was a little creeped out by their obvious biweekly routine, but it just puts Hal in such a good mood. He really is much nicer to be around,” Murray told the Flipside. 

Guthrie, who was not known for his kindness or friendliness, does seem to exhibit increased levels of whistling and generosity post-coital, even sometimes allowing Murray to copy his problem sets. Says Murray, “Yeah, I figure if I ever need something, I can just get Kaitlin to butter him up for me. Not that I really want to be involved in all that, actually.”

You May Also Like

Ask the Flipside: Ask a Reminiscing Sophomore at Dorm Storm

Dear Reminiscing Sophomore, I’m finding it hard to interject during discussion section.…

Cultural Differences in Chinese Fire Drill Lead to Explosion

Investigators have concluded that the car outside of Bob recently caught fire…

Our Body is a Wonderland: A Message From President Hennessy

Welcome Class of 2017! It is my great honor and privilege to…

Op-ed: Here’s what you need to know about those fuzzy little caterpillars

If you’ve been particularly observant this quarter, you may have noticed one…