In a bid to plug a major hole in state alcohol laws, the California state government passed a law declaring it a felony to play Mariokart while intoxicated.
Governor Schwarzenegger commented, “For as long as any of us can remember, it has been illegal to operate cars, boats and bicycles while intoxicated because of the inherent danger that such activity presents. Yet, despite these dangers, it has been legal for many years to drink alcohol while driving a Mariokart.”
It’s common for people to get behind a controller after a few drinks and operate this sort of motor vehicle. This often results in falling off of Rainbow Road or plunging into freezing ice water in Sherbet Land. Schwarzenegger continued, “These are dangers that are preventable, and with the criminalization of the MUI, I think damages will decrease significantly.”
Police have already responded to the law, cracking down on myriad offenders. Stanford junior James Maddox was apprehended in his room in Slavianskii Dom yesterday by Officer Alan Manley.
“I saw open containers everywhere in the room,” said Manley in an official statement, “and he blew a .16. If he thought he could just cruise down Luigi Raceway in a state like that, he thought wrong. I’m glad I apprehended him before he was hit by a shell or a fake question block; if that had happened, he could have overturned and bounced around a few times before returning to his original orientation and continuing on in the level. Drinking and Mariokarting is just stupid and dangerous, and I’m glad that this law was passed.”
Schwarzenegger hints that the California government is planning on passing similar bills to prevent people from drinking while playing Gran Turismo, Cruisin’ USA and Diddy Kong Racing, but that it may take at least a year for these measures to pass.
“Still,” said the Governator, “the MUI is a big step forward, and I am proud that California drivers will be safe from harm.”