Vancouver Welcomes Cross-Country Snowboarding For Newest Olympic Event

February 16, 2010 5:31 pm
Vancouver Welcomes Cross-Country Snowboarding For Newest Olympic Event

Evolved not from the highest levels of competition, but in the everyday jostling of the lift lines, the rising popularity of cross-country snowboarding has vaulted the event onto the Olympic stage. The newest sport pits snowboarding dude against snowboarding bro for five kilometers of flat terrain. Unlike cross-country skiing, where […]

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Facebook Feeling Pressure From Fast Growing Group: ‘1,000,000 Members and Facebook Has To Go Back to Old Format’

5:29 pm
Facebook Feeling Pressure From Fast Growing Group: ‘1,000,000 Members and Facebook Has To Go Back to Old Format’

So far 35 people have joined, mostly from the Southworth Middle School network.

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Soap Running Out!

February 12, 2010 8:12 am
Soap Running Out!

GOVERNOR’S CORNER –Fear and unrest have taken control of Apartment 205 of Suites-Jenkins after the six-man suite realized its supply of hand soap was dwindling. “We’re trying to make do,” says Cliff Crosland, one resident of the suite.  “When it was like a quartery full we re-filled it with water and […]

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Bill Clinton Hospitalized for Paper Cut

8:05 am
Bill Clinton Hospitalized for Paper Cut

Former President Bill Clinton was hospitalized this Thursday to obtain medical care for what doctors concluded was a massive paper cut.  Doctors immediately bandaged the wound and gave his boo-boo a kiss. Dr. McDonald, chief of surgery at Washington Methodist, said, “It was good that he came in when he did.  If […]

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What Professors Do During Office Hours

February 10, 2010 2:13 am
What Professors Do During Office Hours
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Seven Year Old Actually Becomes Chocolate Ice Cream

1:35 am
Seven Year Old Actually Becomes Chocolate Ice Cream

Despite warnings from his grandmother, seven year old Ricky Goldberg continued to eat chocolate ice cream until he actually became a pile of chocolate ice cream. “I always told him, ‘You know Ricky, if you eat too much of that ice cream, you’ll just turn into ice cream,’” said his […]

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