It is reported that Comparative Literature student Emmett Capanard keeps referring to his classes by their course code, as if anyone else on campus knows what the fuck his humanities-learnin’ ass is talking about.

“I asked Emmett what he was taking this fall,” recalled Emma Blevins, a Computer Science major. “And I swear to God, he said to me, ‘Well, I’m mainly excited for 223.’ Yeah, asshole, as if I know what that means.”

Others were equally confused.

“This fucking kid, man,” commented Edmundo Reyes, Capanard’s RA. “I asked him if he had a chill schedule, and his answer, verbatim, was ‘Well, 119 isn’t gonna be too bad, but 40X is supposed to be a real killer.’”

Reyes, who is pursuing a degree in Electrical Engineering, had no idea what any of that meant.

“What kind of self-obsessed egotist assumes everyone else has an inherent understanding of their particular major’s course naming conventions?” Reyes said, rolling his eyes. “You really can’t just tell me what the classes are about? Jesus Christ, dude.”

Of course, not every class on Capanard’s schedule seems beyond his peers’ grasp.

“To be fair, he did tell me he was taking 106A this quarter,” Reyes conceded. “So at least I know that much.”

Capanard appreciated the recognition.

“Oh, yeah, ‘CompLit 106A: Gendered Paradigms in Post-Elizabethan Monology’ is supposed to be really interesting,” commented Capanard. “I’m happy everyone is being so supportive of it.”

Sign Up for Our Newsletter

Get the Stanford Flipside sent to your inbox!

You May Also Like

Study Finds: If Your Hand is Bigger than Your Face You Need Surgery

In a packed auditorium on Saturday, Stanford Hospital Director Ken Toshi informed…

Following investigation of lecturer Alex Gould, SEC realizes that entirety of Stanford University is and elaborate, multi-tiered marketing pyramid scheme led by MTL

Last month, the Univeristy was shocked when the United States Securities and…

Stanford Admins Exasperated at Having to Send Yet Another Fucking Email About Current Events