Justin Trudeau Makes Local Student Question Sexuality, Nationality

October 28, 2015 9:00 am
Views: 767
NA-TRUDEAU-EDBOARD5 The editorial board met with Liberal leadership candidate Justin Trudeau on April 5, 2013. 

CARLOS OSORIO/TORONTO STAR

On October 19th, Canada officially elected boxer, politician, and general hottie Justin Trudeau as Prime Minister of Canada, representing the Liberal Party. While many criticized Justin for his youth, inexperience, and “that fucking baby face,” he won an overwhelming majority on a platform including intense immigration reform.

“I really like him” local student Robbie Ford stated. “And with his liberal stance on immigration, I’m now thinking about moving to Canada!” When asked about which specific policies of Trudeau convinced Ford to consider the move, Robbie replied, “Oh many things! His stances on LGBTQ rights, those dreamy eyes, universal health care in Canada, his perfectly quaffed hair… Sorry but I just want to be Canadian. You know the feeling, eh?” Robert later added, looking dreamily into the distance, “Also, I’m definitely straight, but I wouldn’t mind if Trudeau turned the Mounties into Mount-Me’s. Mount-me, Justin Trudeau. He is definitely the best Justin we’ve known from Canada for a while.”

Now that Canada has elected Trudeau as the new Prime Minister, he hopes to warm the hearts of every Canadian like a steaming cup of Tim Horton’s. Canada has chosen quite the PMILF and, surprisingly, doesn’t seem to be very apologetic about it.

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