In light of recent complaints that the core requirements for the electrical engineering major do not adequately prepare students for
working environments after graduation, the department has added several new courses to the breadth requirement. Starting spring
quarter, new classes such as “EE 224: Crystal Lattice Structures and How to Convincingly Hide an Erection” and “EE 225: Semiconductor
Physics with Emphasis on Applying Deodorant” are intended to fill present gaps in EE education at Stanford without compromising the
notoriously rigorous quality of the major.
“We think these classes will add necessary depth from which many of our students will benefit,” reported Dean of Engineering Joan Drellis, “It’s important that our students go out into the world with basic skills, such as understanding the Fourier transform and knowing which way to put the condom on before trying to unroll it down the shaft. What better way to check both boxes than covering both topics in a single course?”
Despite the assuredly well-meaning intentions of the department, students are finding these courses extremely insulting. “I can’t believe that I have to pass ‘transistor physics and maintaining eye contact during conversation without looking creepy,’” reports junior Taylor White, “I think that the fact that they think we don’t know basic transistor physics casts a pall of shame over the entire EE student body. I mean, have you even looked at the syllabus? Christ!”