Dear Yoürmôm,

I always feel so awkward at parties because I don’t know what to talk about.  Do you know any good jokes?

Best,

Maladroit in Munger

 

Dear Maladroit,

Yoürmôm know many joke.  They make joke book about me.  Is called “Yoürmôm Jôkes”.   They make fun of Yoürmôm because Yoürmôm works nights in stripping club.

 

Dear Yoürmôm,

I just don’t know how to break up with my boyfriend.  I want to let him down easy but he’s so clingy that I’m afraid I’ll crush him.

Sincerely,

Fickle in FloMo

 

Dear Fickle,

Yoürmôm has lots of boyfriend because Yoürmôm is good in bed.

 

Dear Yoürmôm,

What should I do today?

Best,

Aimless in Arroyo

 

Dear Aimless,

You could go suck lots of the dick, that’s what Yoürmôm do.

Sincerely,

Yoürmôm

 

Dear Yoürmôm,

I want to lose a few pounds but I can’t seem to find the willpower. What should I do?

Sincerely,

Vain in Twain

 

Dear Vain,

Yoürmôm so fat.  No can help.

 

Dear Yoürmôm,

I feel like my best friend has changed a lot in the last few months.  She’s started hanging out with other people and we don’t have anything to talk about anymore. Is it worth staying friends?

Concerned in Crothers

 

Dear Concerned,

Yoürmôm has best friend, Yoürfâce.  Yoürfâce is ugly, but Yoürmôm loves anyway because Yoürmôm has low standards.

You May Also Like

Study: Young Men Who Play Violent, Serpentine Video Games More Likely to Eat Lots of Apples, Grow Incrementally Longer

A new study by the Stanford psychology department appears to confirm parents’…

News in Brief: Uruguay legalizes Marijuana

President Jose Mujica has vaulted his South American home into the national…