It looks to be a night of booze, beats, and barf this coming Friday at Beta Gamma Omega’s first annual “Regurgitation Rager,” a party aimed at truly capturing the spirit of a weekend at the Farm early in the Fall quarter.

“I mean, it really just gets right to the point,” said an anonymous brother of the fraternity. “We kept looking around for ideas for party themes, and we were having a lot of trouble. All the good ones, like ‘Awkwardly Staring at Girls You’re Never Going to Dance With- Fest’ and ‘A Giving Up, Going Back to Your Dorm, and Working on You Econ P-Set Extravaganza’ had already been done. But we still felt like we could really find a theme that embodied the essence of a night at the house. And then, one fateful Saturday morning, when we were cleaning up some Frosh’s chunks off the bathroom wall, we realized that the answer was right I front of us all along.”

Posters have already gone up throughout Wilbur and Stern, and excitement is building within the Class of 2017. Early reports hint that guys plan on going as janitors or ER doctors, and that girls plan on dressing as overwhelmed 18 and 19 year old girls struggling with their sexual identities as they transition into college. If that doesn’t sound like a recipe for a party, it’s hard to imagine what is.

“Gee whiz!” said one Frosh as he stepped out of Okada, “That sure sounds like one ‘hella’ of a shin-dig! Also, do you know where the Memorial Auditorium is?” Whether or not the brothers of Gamma were wise in their choice of theme will only become clear after the weekend, but preliminary reports suggest that it will be a night to not remember.

You May Also Like

Student Has Midterm Crisis, Finds Fulfillment in New Bike

The last thing James Halpern remembered before passing out was the curve…

So Cool! MTL Dabbed After Signing an Arms Deal With the Saudi Military, and It Is #GivingUsLife

Okay, look — we all already know Marc “Daddy” Tessier “Daddy” Lavigne…

Single Survivor Cheers Glory of Korea in Irradiated Ruins of Pyongyang

PYONGYANG- Among the desolate remains of Pyongyang’s buildings, a single sound can…