Early Monday morning, a freshman math major was discovered outside of Sigma Nu mumbling incomprehensibly and surrounded by balled-up sheets of paper and eraser shavings. After paramedics fed and calmed him, the student identified himself as Martin Bologne from Des Moines, Iowa. Bologne explained that after going to Sigma Nu on Friday night to attend a frat party, he saw Greek letters adorning the roof and interpreted them as an infinite series. Unable to resist the sweet allure of a math problem, he camped out on the grass, determined to solve the problem before attending the party.
Even after being forcibly removed by campus police three days later, Bologne has not yet been able to wrangle the elusive solution. He is currently receiving proper medical attention at the Vaden Health Center, along with a Computer Science major who developed severe arthritis after trying to decode all the numbers on the P.O. boxes at the Postal Center.