Stanford Bookstore Astounds Students With All Time Low Prices

April 3, 2009 8:06 pm
Stanford Bookstore Astounds Students With All Time Low Prices

STANFORD–On the cool, misty morning of January 5th, the Stanford Bookstore kicked off the new quarter with its usual blockbuster sale. By 7:30 A.M., a full thirty minutes before opening, the 7% discount on required textbooks and course readers had attracted enough students to form a line that wrapped around […]

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March Madness To Be Covered Under Universal Health Care

March 29, 2009 11:00 pm
March Madness To Be Covered Under Universal Health Care

After learning that the disease often contracted in the spring, March Madness, was not covered in America’s healthcare plan for millions of citizens, President Obama decided action was necessary. At a press conference earlier today, The President addressed the issue, “This is a serious problem. We need to change the […]

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Math Becomes Interdisciplinary

10:55 pm
Math Becomes Interdisciplinary

Subject Combines Study of Foreign Language With Math In a move that showcases Stanford’s ever powerful ability to locate ties between disparate subject areas, Math has been merged with the foreign language department. “For a long time we imported Math professors simply to make math as hard as possible to […]

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Letter From the Editor: Ensuring the Financial Future of the Flipside

10:50 pm
Letter From the Editor: Ensuring the Financial Future of the Flipside

If you’ve been reading the Stanford Daily lately, or skimming the headlines of the New York Times to keep you superficially informed, you know that the Daily is going downhill. So are lots of other newspapers because they are based on old-world print models like advertising. But at the Flipside, […]

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Student In Trouble For Irresponsible Guests

March 8, 2009 4:06 pm
Student In Trouble For Irresponsible Guests

Parents Found Puking, Vandalizing; Son Put on Probation By Jorie Carmeister STANFORD—Freshman student Troy Altman, a member of the dorm Naranja, is now on probation after hosting several guests who failed to respect dormitory rules. According to the RA, the guests were found puking on the floor, tearing down posters, […]

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OPINION: Why Didn’t Anyone Tell me Max Weinstein Was Jewish!?

3:58 pm
OPINION: Why Didn’t Anyone Tell me Max Weinstein Was Jewish!?

By Joel Weinstein JERUSALEM—I like to think I’m a reasonable person. I know how to think, I can make logical inferences about the world, and on rare occasions I’ve even been known to think outside of the box, but last Thursday I was shocked when, while looking through the local […]

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Trojan Fooled into Ranking Stanford Most Sexually Healthy

March 6, 2009 2:07 am
Trojan Fooled into Ranking Stanford Most Sexually Healthy

In a recent study funded by Trojan and conducted by an independent research firm, Stanford was found to be the most sexually healthy school in the nation. Sitting on top of Columbia and Cornell for the first time gave administrators and students a very, very good feeling. Unfortunately, recent information […]

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Report: Stanford No Longer Well-Endowed

March 1, 2009 10:49 pm
Report: Stanford No Longer Well-Endowed

A report released yesterday by USA Today revealed that Stanford, in the midst of the nation’s crisis, can no longer be considered “well-endowed.” Vice Provost for Undergraduate Education John Bravman was “saddened” but remained optimistic. “Why do you have to always compare us to other schools like Harvard and Yale,” […]

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Entrepreneur Excited to Start New Romantic Venture

10:47 pm
Entrepreneur Excited to Start New Romantic Venture

Recent graduate and Silicon Valley technology entrepreneur Jason Pirloni claimed he was “extremely excited about the prospects” of a new romantic venture he was pursuing. The project, named Jessica Simon, has been in the works since he met her two months ago. “It’s looking really good,” Pirloni said. “All of […]

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TA Spends Another Valentine’s Day Office Hours Alone

10:45 pm
TA Spends Another Valentine’s Day Office Hours Alone

With the next problem set not due until one week later, Math 51 Teaching Assistant Derek Mitchell spent his February 14th, 3:30 pm to 5 pm weekly office hours alone again in Room 380-U. “I didn’t expect there to be anything special, like a whole room of students who wanted […]

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