Kids Finally Allowed to Watch TV

March 31, 2014 12:00 pm
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Kids Finally Allowed to Watch TV

After nine years of listening to their father’s longwinded tale of how he moped and slept around until one day meeting their mother, Penny and Luke Mosby were finally excused to go watch TV.   Many times over, the kids tried to curtail the ongoing story by cutting off their father, with “Okay, and that’s how you met mom, we get it,” but to no avail. Every day after school they dutifully returned home to sit in front of their father and listen to the needlessly convoluted story of his courtship of literally dozens of women who would not become his wife and their mother.

Not understanding why a gag with the limo driver was so involved in the “meet cute” of their parents, the siblings had desperately wanted to leave for ages, it seemed.  “I was beyond relieved when Dad finally wrapped that whole thing up,” said daughter Penny.  “I’ve had virtually no social life since this thing started, though I got to hear all about my dad’s old social life… I was really getting weirded out by all the creepy sex stories about Uncle Barney. And apparently Aunt Robin has slept with almost every male role model in my life.”

Added son Luke, “Yeah, and it felt like it took him a whole season to talk about that wedding- and it wasn’t even his own wedding! Man, I need a sandwich.”

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