Post Tagged with: "Drake"

PWR Director Announces Students can Replace PWR 1 by Ghostwriting MTL’s Emails

May 17, 2020 11:40 amComments Off on PWR Director Announces Students can Replace PWR 1 by Ghostwriting MTL’s Emails
PWR Director Announces Students can Replace PWR 1 by Ghostwriting MTL’s Emails

Recently, PWR faculty director Adam Banks announced that students could apply to ghostwrite President Marc Tessier–Lavigne’s coronavirus update emails instead of taking PWR 1. The idea was actually President Tessier–Lavigne’s own.  “It’s easy, really – I just don’t have the time,” said Tessier–Lavigne, as he invested 10% of the endowment […]

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Cool Grandma Plans To Get “Eggnog Blitzed” This Holiday Season

December 5, 2016 12:00 pmComments Off on Cool Grandma Plans To Get “Eggnog Blitzed” This Holiday Season
Cool Grandma Plans To Get “Eggnog Blitzed” This Holiday Season

Betty Peterson, 90, is quick to remind family and friends that she lives for only two things in this world: “playing bridge and getting belligerent.” Regarding last year’s holiday events, Betty’s youngest grandson Doug recounted: “Last Christmas, I asked Santa for a new skateboard. I was really excited to see […]

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Soccer Dad Sues Drake Over Hotline Bling Dance Moves

October 27, 2015 10:00 amComments Off on Soccer Dad Sues Drake Over Hotline Bling Dance Moves
Soccer Dad Sues Drake Over Hotline Bling Dance Moves

Todd Williams’ normal suburban life took an interesting turn last week when his twin girls, Rebecca and Elise, showed him Drake’s new video for his smash hit ‘Hotline Bling’. “I always admired Drake’s music, and I used to feel as if he was a sort of kindred spirit to us […]

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Lonely Sex Robot Inhabiting Drake’s Brain Achieves Sentience

September 28, 2015 12:00 pmComments Off on Lonely Sex Robot Inhabiting Drake’s Brain Achieves Sentience
Lonely Sex Robot Inhabiting Drake’s Brain Achieves Sentience

The music world is abuzz with the news that following the release of the collaborative Drake/Future mixtape, What a Time to Be Alive, robot L0v3-U-G1RL, which has lived inside Drake’s brain for the past six years, has finally gained the sentience that was long denied it. The discovery came after detailed analysis […]

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