Recent reports indicate that rapper Ben Haggerty, better known as Macklemore, has added another major award to his resume, accepting the Nobel Prize in Economics. The accolade came as a shock, with heavyweight contenders such as Robert J. Schiller and Jean-Jacques Lafont thought to be shoo-ins for the prize. With the decision, Macklemore becomes the first rapper to win the famed Nobel Prize, the previous closest being Flava Flav’s Honorable Mention in Chemistry.

Many are outraged, claiming that Macklemore had no right to win the award and should perhaps have lost to Biggie Smalls’ far more seminal effort, “Mo Money, Mo Problems.” Among the outraged was Stanford economics major, freshman Timmy Chandler, who stated that, “I’ve only taken Econ 1, man, but I’m pretty sure I understand what Macklemore is saying. He’s saying, you know, like, as supply increases, demand increases and so we have to trade in our systems for one based on looking for a come-up.”

Despite the shock, the Nobel committee was adamant in the rectitude of their decision, stating that, “Without Haggerty, we would not know the about the invalidity in paying fifty dollars for a T-shirt, nor would we know the necessity of incentivizing a fur fox skin. In this current economic climate, such messages of spending cuts and cutbacks are much needed, especially when considered in the context of flannel zebra jammies.”

Haggerty himself, however, remains reticent in discussing the prize. He apologized to economist Nouriel Roubini, tweeting “I know I robbed you, man. I wanted you to win. It sucks and I know that.” Roubini, at time of press, responded, “I don’t care what that man thinks. Can’t Hold Us is an awful song.”

Sign Up for Our Newsletter

Get the Stanford Flipside sent to your inbox!

You May Also Like

Study Finds: If Your Hand is Bigger than Your Face You Need Surgery

In a packed auditorium on Saturday, Stanford Hospital Director Ken Toshi informed…

Study Confirms That Bitches, As Suspected, Ain’t Shit But Hoes and Tricks

When Dr. Dre proposed in his seminal theoretical work, “The Chronic”, the…

Connections to Steroid Ring Finally Explain Peyton Manning’s Giant Forehead

Following last week’s announcement of an upcoming Al-Jazeera documentary that alleges that…