Students present in Creative Fiction Writing last Tuesday report that, while participating in a peer review session, sophomore Thomas Sutton described his short story as “Hemingway-esque.” He explained that his narrative entitled “Nightfall in Cleveland” exhibited traits such as “terse prose” and “a penetrating examination of masculinity” reminiscent of the great American modernist.

Sutton’s peers didn’t share his assessment, noting his story lacked any semblance of plot and was riddled with grammatical errors.

“The dialogue sounded like if the characters from Leave it to Beaver had strokes and then tried to freestyle rap,” said classmate Tina Wellstone, “And someone should probably tell him how similes work. I actually shuddered a little when I read, ‘The tree was as tall as a 50 foot building.’”

Sutton says he plans to submit the story to a publication on campus and, if things go well, some higher profile literary journals.

“I just hope people get it,” said the sophomore, referring to his seven page “portrait of modern America,” “So many great writers are never appreciated in their lifetime.”

You May Also Like

Climate Change Deniers Describe Australian Fires as God’s Punishment for Cats

DOWN UNDER, AU – Climate change deniers in Australia recently contributed several…

Movie Magic: CGI Carrie Fisher to be Posthumously Inserted into “Epic / Hilarious Nut-Taps [4 hrs]” Youtube Compilation

In recent weeks, there has been some rumbling surrounding J.J. Abrams’ decision…

Op-Ed: Laugh At Yourselves, Please

What up, flipstronauts? Graduation is upon us. As all y’all seniors finally…

The Homo Froshicus Froshicus, A Wonder of Nature

Every fall, the bicycle-ridden concrete jungle of Stanford University is hit by…