The sun is shining, flowers are growing, birds are singing, and……okay those two squirrels are doing it. But I guess that’s spring for you.
Because it’s getting warmer all the animals are coming out of their winter hibernation, and honestly, my little guy is waking up too. See the thing about spring is that the weather is gorgeous, and so are the girls. They’re not wearing those stupid winter clothes anymore.
You know, those over-sized, over-fluffed, over-furry coats that make you look like a bear. Man, there is nothing so off-putting as a pair of earmuffs. Come spring, girls are finally wearing normal things again, like skinny jeans, tank tops, yoga pants, and my personal favorite, the sundresses. They’re flowy and short and I….I just can’t. And then the really daring girls bust out the booty shorts early.
For some reason they’re even sexier in the spring than in the winter. New grass and flowers aren’t the only things shooting upwards, let me tell you.
 
Spring is all about growth and life, and I can’t help that my libido comes alive too. I know it isn’t just me; this season must put a lot of other people in the mood too. If all the little furry animals can get it on, why can’t we?
As a wise man once said, “You and me baby ain’t nothin’ but mammals.” So to any girl who’s looking to celebrate the coming of spring with a coming of her own, hit me up. Because I’m not ashamed to admit that spring makes me horny. 

You May Also Like

Existential Paranoia Spreads As Construction Fencing Now Completely Surrounds Campus

Abby Ker, ‘24, couldn’t believe her eyes. Her morning bike commute to…

I Frantically Ran Up to An Allegory of a Decrepit, Limping, Blind, Albino Man to Demand Answers Pertaining to Universal Truth

There I was, late last night, lost and dripping with confusion over…

Inspiring: Stanford Student Takes a Stand Against Cold Weather by Transferring

(For confidentiality purposes, the Flipside will not be using Reed Pearson’s name…

Students Joining “Fuck Caterpillars” Club Confused If Sexytime Fuck or Derogatory Fuck

STANFORD – As a larger and larger crowd built at Old Union…