8-year-old Billy Swarthout claimed victory in a 6-hour chess match that concluded on January 28, 2011 at 6:05 pm. His grandfather, Charles Swathout, had started the game with the Sicilian Defense. The clever defensive strategy left his poor grandson puzzled. “After about 20 minutes of Billy not moving, grandpa offered billy to take a break to grab pb&j,” reported Billy’s younger sister Jessie. According to anonymous reports, Billy never returned to the board and went on to play call of duty, where he felt more confident his skill and technical prowess. When his grandfather passed away five hours later, he proceeded to claim victory. Although Billy does not yet have a rating, he is planning to apply for recognition of the victory from the United States Chess Federation.

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[frosoco-politics-0910] [frosoco-chat-0910] DON’T DRY OTHER PEOPLE’S LAUNDRY!! JUST PUT IT SOMEWHERE! Someone shrunk my stuff. D:< (eom) [sic]

From: Kenny Date: Mon, May 17, 2010 at 8:55 PM To: frosoco-chat-0910@lists.stanford.edu…