Post Tagged with: "blood"

OpEd: I totally screwed my Roo by framing him for murder

May 1, 2017 12:00 pmComments Off on OpEd: I totally screwed my Roo by framing him for murder
OpEd: I totally screwed my Roo by framing him for murder

Hey, Gibby here. I know there’s technically no “winner” of Screw your Roo, an event put on in most freshmen dorms to help get your roommate screwed, but if there was, I might as well be handed the prize right now. Rather than going the normal route of setting my […]

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Area Gym Teacher Not Here to Fuck Around

October 12, 2015 12:00 pmComments Off on Area Gym Teacher Not Here to Fuck Around
Area Gym Teacher Not Here to Fuck Around

While the whiny squirts of Mrs. Pinkerton’s second grade class must have thought they were showing up for basket weaving or some shit, area gym teacher Anthony Muller informed them early Monday that neither he nor they had come to gym class to fuck around. Not. At. All. “Are you […]

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Breaking News: Only Four Dead in Most Rewarding Dance Marathon Yet

February 18, 2015 9:00 amComments Off on Breaking News: Only Four Dead in Most Rewarding Dance Marathon Yet
Breaking News: Only Four Dead in Most Rewarding Dance Marathon Yet

Reporting that this year was perhaps the fundraiser’s most successful to date, coordinators for the popular Stanford Dance Marathon announced yesterday that they were able to raise over $1,000 for Partners in Health Rwanda—all while keeping fatalities at a record low. “Dance Marathon is an incredible opportunity for people to […]

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