Opinion: Fetuses Don’t Deserve the Right To Vote- Animals Do! Look, man, the neofascist, religious freakout Republicans are calling for the government… Joel CummingsFebruary 8, 2009
13 - The Inauguration Issue Headlines Online Politics Year 1 Bill Clinton Accepts Presidency In Zoolander-Like Display Joel CummingsJanuary 31, 2009
13 - The Inauguration Issue Articles Politics US Year 1 In Waning Days of Presidency, Bush Turns Attention to Presidential Library As President Bush prepares to hand over the White House to Barack… Joel CummingsJanuary 18, 2009
09 Articles Entertainment Year 1 Revolutionary Soft Drink Pepsialis to Hit Stores Next Week A collaboration between beverage giant PepsiCo and erectile dysfunction upstart Cialis has… Joel CummingsNovember 30, 2008
08 Articles Stanford Year 1 President Hennessy Spotted On Campus According to several eyewitnesses, Stanford President John Hennessy was seen walking between… Joel CummingsNovember 16, 2008
America’s Balls Shrink 40% After Obama Victory, GOP’s Worst Fears Confirmed True to the predictions of several conservative pundits and bloggers, electing the… Joel CummingsNovember 8, 2008
06 Articles Year 1 Scientist Discovers Disease, Names After Arch-Rival The humble Dr. Timothy Flugin of the Center for Disease Control may… Joel CummingsNovember 1, 2008
05 Articles Stanford Year 1 ASSU Introduces Joint Resolution in Wake of Latest Squabble After endlessly bickering over a 00 disaster known as the Welcome Barbecue,… Joel CummingsOctober 25, 2008
04 - The Full Moon on the Quad Issue Headlines Online Stanford Year 1 “He Licked My Face!” : Overzealous Kisser Terrorizes Freshmen at Full Moon Festivities Joel CummingsOctober 19, 2008
04 - The Full Moon on the Quad Issue Articles Life Stanford Year 1 37% of Full Moon Revelers Identify as Both ‘Senior’ and ‘Freshman’ According to exit polls conducted by undercover reporters, 72% of Full Moon… Joel CummingsOctober 19, 2008
