Op-ed: Does Anyone Want To Buy Me A Recorder?

January 29, 2018 9:00 am
Views: 142
Op-ed: Does Anyone Want To Buy Me A Recorder?

Hey there! Little Jimmy in the house. I know we haven’t formally met, but I’ve got a quick question for you: do you want to buy me a recorder? Doesn’t have to be fancy, just anything made out of a nice, durable plastic should do the trick. You can find them at any local music emporium, or even on Amazon for the tune of ten to fifteen buckaroos. And you don’t have to worry about a cleaning rod or case, I already have got those covered.

Look, I know you might have some questions, like “why would I buy you a recorder? I don’t even know you,” and “what do you plan to do with that recorder?”  And you have a point. Let me introduce myself.

I go by Little Jimmy, since there were a few assorted sizes of Jimmies in the orphanage I grew up in — oh yeah, I’m an orphan by choice, by the way. I don’t have a ton of musical background but I do love a good lyre and have been known to play it occasionally. And about the whole Greensleeves vs. Hot Cross Buns debate in the recorder community, I definitely come down firmly on the side of Greensleeves. I also have dabbled in composing my own original songs, and I really think they have some potential.

Anyway, I just think that getting me a recorder would be a nice thing to do and I’d think you’re a super cool person if you get me one. I just really, really want a recorder. Not only is it the most prominent type of duct flute in western classical tradition, but it even has some historic charm, dating back to the Middle Ages.  I’d even be willing to give you a concert of a few songs once I get real good.

So please, just hear me out on this request. Send me a recorder — used or new, large or small, I’m not picky.

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