Jonathan Huang, ‘27, believes he has found a paradigm-shifting solution to Earth’s energy crisis: the ProFro Hamster Wheel. Huang claims that the device is “like a wheel for small rodents, but for ProFros, who are of course virtually indistinguishable from small rodents.” Huang plans to debut the device at Admit Weekend, where he is serving as a RoHo and hopes to entice all 4 of his ProFros into trying the Wheel.
When asked for comment, the Stanford Mechanical Engineering Department replied that Huang “is our GOAT” and that while they “do not typically endorse forced labor, are ProFros even people?,” seemingly unaware that those from outside the Stanford Campus are indeed human. Huang tells The Flipside that “with just the neurotic energy of twelve to fifteen ProFros, we can use the Wheel to generate power for the entire
West Coast.” Huang recently received twelve billion dollars in Y-Combinator funding.
