This past Sunday, the residents of Otero celebrated once again topping Buzzfeed’s “Dormcest Capitals of the World” list, first by screening season 17 of “The Bachelor,” then reviewing a PowerPoint presentation on the ways freshman typically like to indicate they’re having sex (sock on the doorknob, tie on the doorknob, cruller on the doorknob, etc.) and culminating in a dorm-wide orgy.

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Delighted screaming was heard coming from the dorm beginning at 6 PM and continuing into the night, but it is unsure what the basis of that screaming really was.

Irina Castanas, an Otero RA, opened her P.O. box to find it stuffed with threatening letters from RAs at different universities including Cal, Harvard, and John Paul the Great Catholic University, the last of which recently held the top spot. An excerpt from one of the letters states that the RA was “most upset at the recent change in ranking” but will “take pleasure, literally, in imagining the subsequent celebration that will occur,” suggesting that Irina “take [her] advice and hook up with a freshman” as it was “probably the best decision she ever made.”

Otero is in the process of planning a whole week-long festival dedicated to dormcest-based activities and events, including inviting Otero alumni to share their dormcest experiences. After asking for a response from Preeti, her only comment was that she has no idea where the fuck all those RAs found her P.

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O. box address.

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