1

Samantha: I love cross-platform cloud-based computing. I want to make the world a better, more connected place through smart tech. Also, I am a squirrel, a type of rodent.


 

5

James: I forage for nuts all day, even though there are very few nut-bearing trees here. My 18 children and I live in a tree where we eat the few nuts that I can find. I’m not sure what “tech” is, but if it is more nuts, yes, I would love to do “tech.”


 

4

Martin: I’m currently interested in wearables, but the available products on the market do not properly address the needs of squirrels. I recognize that it is a crowded marketspace, but what am I supposed to do, wear an Apple Watch as a belt?! C’mon!


 

3

Marco: I, Marco, am a squirrel, and I have an opinion about tech that is the opposite of Martin’s, who is also a squirrel. Wearable tech is clearly a bubble; play it safe, stay in low-level systems engineering, and eat more nuts to keep your head clear.


 
2

Alexandra: I did SLE. Read a fucking book.

You May Also Like

Mattel Releases New Educational Toy “Cat in the Box”

In a conference attended by tens of interested toy magnates, Mattel announced…

Stanford Adds Poultry Science to School of Humanities

In what experts are universally regarding as a sad, desperate bid to…