South Bend – Following recent revelations in the ongoing Manti Te’o saga, the Notre Dame community is shocked and dismayed to discover that something they believed in never actually existed. The Fighting Irish and their scores of devoted fans the world over were already dealing with a big loss to Alabama in the National Championship Game when the news broke. Now, some are reexamining their unwavering support of the team and University in light this new information.
“It should have been obvious. I mean, it’s some person we’ve never seen, never met, living thousands of miles away. The only record we have of her is through dodgy, second-hand sources,” said Tom Mullaney, a senior linebacker for Notre Dame. “We’re told she loves us, and we’re supposed to love her. And then she dies a painful death so that we can go on and do great things? It’s a good story–too good to be true.”
Many supporters are especially distressed by the fact that the University knew about the hoax as early as December but did not take the information public.
“They covered it up because the story had taken on a life of its own. They were already too deeply invested in the narrative,” said Wendy Kaleing, a Notre Dame Alum. “I can actually believe that Te’o wasn’t in on it at first. He was looking for someone to love, to hold on to, and they tricked him. But he had to have found out and didn’t say anything for fear of embarrassment. Either that, or he was basically in love with a Ghost.”
Commentators have argued that this scandal will drive fans away. However, those who are familiar with the University know that its supporters have put up with far worse, everything from pedophile priests to Charlie Weis, and that, as long as Touchdown Jesus is in South Bend, they’ll keep coming back.