With costs of higher education ever inflating and recent funding cuts, many students are concerned about their future at Stanford. The Flipside spoke with Christina Leigh, a student at Stanford University, about her concerns for the future of her education. At the top of her list was the “abolishing of FAFSA” and “having to figure out a way to cough up $90k a year for this fuckass degree.”
Clearly, unprecedented circumstances call for innovative solutions.
“While I am worried about my future profession, I will partake in the world’s oldest profession,” Leigh explained.
She’s already started networking in what she calls the “sex-conomy.” Leigh claims that attending Stanford, where the student body is 80% future VCs, 20% child prodigies, and 100% desperate, gives her a competitive edge. “These dudes don’t know how to talk to women. I’m offering a valuable service.”
When asked for a comment, a spokesperson for Stanford’s financial aid office replied, “We strongly discourage students from engaging in activities that could compromise their safety. However, sex work is real work, and I’d tap that.”
Meanwhile, Leigh is preparing to expand her one-woman operations to launch her own startup. “I mean, this is Silicon Valley. It’s only a matter of time before some 22-year-old with an MBA tries to rebrand escort services as a ‘disruptive relationship-monetization platform.’”
This creative business has allowed Christina to be in a much better position to pay for her schooling. That is, in missionary.
