Issue 288 Puzzles

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Spring Quarter Arrives and Loser Freshman Has Still Fucked Zero Professors

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Federal Aid Cuts Got You Down? I’m Paying for College With Prostitution.

With costs of higher education ever inflating and recent funding cuts, many…

Raine Xiong
April 1, 2025

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Opinion: Girls Scouts of America Troops Walked So DOGE Could Run

Elon Musk’s Department of Government Efficiency has been a central interest for…

Via Lipman
April 1, 2025

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Kappa Alpha Group Chat Accidentally adds Fraternity and Sorority Life Director, Leaking Dirty Rush Plans

Shubhra Mishra
April 1, 2025

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Stanford’s Not So Well-Endowed, Starts New Credit Card Scheme to Get Bigger

In response to federal funding cuts to research, the Stanford Endowment has…

Tina Li
April 1, 2025