Students are reporting that, in the middle of Stanford Information Security Office’s recently released internet safety awareness video, an unspecified number of users received urgent requests for their credit card information. The video promised all users the most secure campus environment in Stanford history, so long as each user provided his or her Visa or MasterCard to demonstrate their commitment to online security.

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One student, Mark Daniels ’15, went to bed Thursday night feeling satisfied that he had grasped the fundamentals of smart conduct in an uncertain online world. He was surprised to find out the next day that he was the proud owner of a brand new sports car in Lagos, Nigeria.

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The video also advised users to click early and often when visiting unfamiliar websites to familiarize themselves with the formats and contents.

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“Each pop-up may unlock the key to your future,” a cheerful narrator proclaimed. “If you can’t get the monkey in the cage, you need not bother showing up to class.

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The security awareness video is mandatory, and all users who have not viewed it completely by October 31 will have their computers impounded by the Stanford Information Security Office, to be given away as prizes to the millionth visitor to Stanford’s website.

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