Happy National Dress Like a Muggle Day!

Life

Freshmen Dorms Brace for Wave of Awkward Sexual Tension on Valentine’s Day

Freshmen Dorms Brace for Wave of Awkward Sexual Tension on Valentine’s Day
In preparation for Valentine’s Day, residents of freshmen dorms have already begun anticipating the messages that they may inadvertently send to their neighbors over the course of the holiday. “I think...
February 13th, 2012

Curtain Rises on Vagina Dialogues

Curtain Rises on Vagina Dialogues
In a surprising announcement, the organizers of V-Week, which raises awareness of violence against women by selling chocolate vaginas and asking men to think about women’s genitals for once, have decided...
February 13th, 2012

Area Man Disappointed That Girls Don’t Flirt the Way They Do On TV

Area Man Disappointed That Girls Don’t Flirt the Way They Do On TV
Saratoga, CA – Fred Collins was spotted this morning leaving a Peet’s coffee with a medium latte and a look of utter dejection. His eyes staring at an unidentifiable point off in the distance,...
February 10th, 2012

Student at a Loss for New Things to Bitch About

Student at a Loss for New Things to Bitch About
As winter quarter heads into its fifth week, freshman Meagan Farley has seemingly worn out her welcome with most of her friends. While the strife of being overworked has been a popular topic for many...
February 9th, 2012

Breaking News: Student Attends Office Hours Solely For Purposes of Kissing Up to Professor, Getting Help on P-Set

Breaking News: Student Attends Office Hours Solely For Purposes of Kissing Up to Professor, Getting Help on P-Set
In a stunning revelation that is sending shock waves throughout East Campus, Otero freshman Taylor Cooper is facing allegations of showing up to Math 51 office hours last Tuesday with no motive other than...
February 7th, 2012

Decision to Euthanize IHUM Sparks Controversy

Decision to Euthanize IHUM Sparks Controversy
IHUM used to be a thriving forum where students sparred and matched wits, a place where students could break bread with such intellectual giants as Nietzsche and Marx. But starting a few years ago, everything...
February 6th, 2012

Flipside Staff Opposes Cuts to IHUM Program

Flipside Staff Opposes Cuts to IHUM Program
In a recent Flipside editorial meeting, the publication’s staff voted unanimously to resist changes to the university’s IHUM program, claiming it would eliminate the most convenient source of jokes...
February 3rd, 2012

Stanford Too Popular for Hipsters

Stanford Too Popular for Hipsters
After a record 37,000 applications were submitted to Stanford University this year, hipsters across the country have started indicating that they no longer find the school attractive. Almost an hour after...
January 23rd, 2012

Report: Stanford Student Too Busy To Breathe

Report: Stanford Student Too Busy To Breathe
Flomo Dining—Jeffrey Golin, a sophomore who lives in Cardenal this year, has been officially declared “too busy to breathe” by the Vaden Health Center, who conducted the study. The study,...
January 18th, 2012

Student Grabs Way More After-Dinner Mints Than Deemed Socially Acceptable After Eating at Nice Restaurant

Student Grabs Way More After-Dinner Mints Than Deemed Socially Acceptable After Eating at Nice Restaurant
Stanford sophomore Marcus Stevenson took considerably too many peppermint-flavored mints after a recent meal at an upscale Italian restaurant on University Avenue, which authorities have refused to identify. Traumatized...
January 17th, 2012
Page 2 of 3212345...102030...Last »