It’s crazy what’s happening in France. All the protesting! Absolutely mind-blowing. Yes, I’m a poli-sci major, so I probably understand the protest to a much more advanced degree than you. But to put it simply, this protest is at once completely unexpected and extremely expected. I want you all to […]

Another Thanksgiving has come and gone. Between the gluttonous binging preceding gut-wrenching regret and the inevitable turkey drops that everyone saw coming, the holiday break brought few shockers outside of typical turkey-centric expectations. In the tradition of ceremonial turkey pardons, President Trump shocked no-one in selecting to pardon two White-Anglo-Saxon-Protestant […]

With political polarization at a fever pitch, it sometimes feels like there’s no middle ground between Democrats and Republicans. And things are only getting worse, if this latest scandal is any indication — after Senator Bernie Sanders offhandedly mentioned that he doesn’t like anchovies, America’s conservatives have taken it upon […]

Tragedy struck on Election Day when longtime Atlanta resident and law-abiding citizen Dave Murphy filled out his voting ballot with a #2½ pencil instead of the mandatory #2, resulting in a cataclysmic chain of events that left three dead and many more injured. Murphy, who had driven that afternoon to […]

Media outlets derided Donald Trump after he referred to adult actress Stormy Daniels as “Horseface” on Twitter. President Trump has clarified the confusion, assuring the public that he was in fact referencing a different ex-lover from the late nineties. “There was this Clydesdale – gorgeous, with great tits, even better […]

Stickers distributed across campus by the Haas Center for Public Service, boldly featuring the phrase “Stanford Votes,” have prompted widespread confusion about how the ad campaign got approved despite being provably false. “Stanford Votes?,” remarked a visibly confused Akul Bhargava, president of Stanford in Government, upon first seeing the stickers. […]